Christmas Letter 2019

 December 2019

To our dear Family and Friends,

I hope our little package of Christmas tidings finds you doing as well as can be.  It’s time to erect our annual monument of gratitude, and I thought I might share it because good things are meant to be shared.  

When I asked the kids what they ranked as our greatest blessing this year, they all agreed it was our summer vacation to Maui.  This was our first ever true vacation due in part, to my drastically reduced life expectancy from the stress of previous family air travel.  This trip came together beautifully though, between Nick’s airline rewards, Mom and Dad accompanying us for a few days, and the twins’ friends’ family (also twins) unexpectedly staying at our resort for an unplanned overlap day.  Our neurotic and elderly, (but loveable) dog Molly stayed in the loving care of the sole pet sitter on Rover.com whose profile picture I ruthlessly judged capable of the job. And as it turned out, is an old friend of the Horn family.  In Hawaii, we boogie boarded, snorkeled, swam, painted sunrises, ate, cartwheeled, shopped, luau-ed and hula-ed to our heart’s content.  Not even my 3 unopened library books for pleasure reading or the dolphin watching tour that produced nausea instead of dolphins dampened our spirits. We were grateful beyond words. 

The one souvenir I sought for the duration of our trip was a Christmas ornament to serve as a reminder of our time together.  My search ran dry until our last excursion before leaving.  We finished our Cheeseburgers in Paradise, and were rapidly approaching the kids’ expiration time when we booked it down Front Street to Kimo’s for a take-out slice of Hula Pie.  When what to my wondering eyes should appear but The Lahaina Christmas Store right next door to Kimo’s! I can’t make this stuff up.  The women working there must’ve thought I’d lost my mind as the kids and I walked through the doorway cheering and I profusely thanked them for the existence of their store.  We were able to select the most perfect clay ornament with with a mom and dad and 4 little hula dancers and had it personalized with “Ohana Horn.” It was the first ornament hung on the tree this year.

Also on the top of our list of blessings; the kids are now students at San Ramon Valley Christian Academy.  Last January, Kris invited me to sit in at the open house to be a sounding board for my nephew, Andy’s, middle school education. Within the first minute of our late arrival, the principal began discussing a specific topic that we’d just been discussing during the car ride there. We looked at each other with sheer astonishment over the coincidence and their radically different approach to such an issue.  The rest of the meeting evoked similar responses and an overwhelming feeling that some way, some how, our kids would benefit as students at the academy.  I called Nick from the parking lot and regaled him with the story of my morning and asked that we pray about sending the children to SRVCA. It would be the solution to the increasing tension we’d been facing in the public school arena.  Sending the kids to a private school that operated out of the same playbook that we’re raising them by at home seemed like a highly ambitious but seriously important decision.  It was not without great anxiety, going from a 3 minute commute to 30, leaving Mom and so many beloved teachers, and the financial impact of 4 children in private school.  We prayed for over a month and the path was made undeniably clear and so was the provision with Nick’s raise that just covered the tuition.  

On August 13, we pushed through the new-kid (and new-mom) jitters and walked onto campus towards the entire staff holding welcome signs, cheering for us “Welcome Horn Family!”  At the first chapel gathering that week, the lead pastor explained to the parents and kids in the audience that they had been praying for over a year to grow the school by 84 students to bring the total number enrolled to 350.  Truly miraculously, they had 90 new students this year.  7 of them being Horn and Sacksteder kids.  He then pulled a new student from each grade level onto the stage to illustrate his message that their presence was an answered prayer.  Among them were Emmy, Hannah, and James. Bearing witness to it literally took my breath away.  (This took place AFTER Julia was welcomed onto the stage to help lead the worship song, fulfilling a prediction that Kris and I had made just 2 minutes prior that we’d see Julia in such a role by the end of the school year.)  My heart nearly burst with joy and peace and gratitude that morning, and every day since.

We spend a lot more time in the car driving now, but it is such a blessing, too.  I see it as my minivan ministry.  We tell stories of yesteryear, sing songs, play games, process the day, practice math facts, initiate and (sometimes) repair conflict, and answer hardball questions about our cultural moment prompted by bumper stickers. It’s been a growth opportunity for all of us.

This spring, Hannah went public with her burpee party trick.  She was determined to perform in the Jensen Ranch talent show by doing as many burpees as she could in an 80 second clip of Timber (the Kidz Bop version) and Emmy graciously offered to be her “counter” on stage.  The morning of her last of 3 shows, she woke up late and tired on the wrong side of the bed, and badly stubbed her toe. She had convinced herself she was incapable of doing a single burpee.  But then, as she does,  she courageously showed up and squashed her previous personal record by doing 37 burpees in front of the upper grades and teachers.  All the while, Emmy counted her on, humbly allowing her little sister to be celebrated.  Psalm 46:5 kept pulsing through my brain: “God is within her, she will not fall, God will help her at break of day.” It was nothing short of inspiring, on so many levels.

I ran the Armed Forces half marathon this May, my first in 9 years. The last one was done with a group of military wives, whose example of fortitude brings me to my knees, while our husbands were serving a long, difficult deployment to Afghanistan.  It was an impactful but difficult and emotional training experience and run.  But by the grace of God, I was able to do it again, and this time I was blessed to have my parents follow me. They cheered me on at different mile markers and my Nick and precious babies were waiting for me at mile 13.  As I rounded the final turn, my compassionate boy broke away from the curb in a dead sprint to run me across the finish line.  I get weepy just thinking about it.  God is so good.

In June, we concocted creative care plans for our collective 16 children, so Nick and I could reunite in Las Vegas with the Boslers, Sacksteders and Andrjeskis. We hadn’t been in the same place without kids in 15 years.  We enjoyed sleeping in (ish), dinners out, The Beatles’ show “Love,” pool time, touring the strip in our rented minivans, and dodging aggressive show girl ads, and we treasured every minute together. Something about spending time with those people who know where you’ve been, helps to better steer you to where you’re going. That trip was transformative. 

We’re so grateful for Julia’s (and by extension each of our) emboldened immune systems, for health insurance and for a renewed sense of the importance of handwashing after the flu, strep throat, various viruses and pneumonia entered our home multiple times over this year. Julia has a kind, but direct, communication style and uses it to remind me to stop my frenetic mom-ing to cuddle and discuss our love for each other every day, but especially on sick days.  The many, many sick days with each of the kids this year allowed for much-needed one-on-one time with conversation and cuddles, thanks to Julia’s great contribution and loving example. 

Some blessings this year have come when Emmy’s observant eye and steel-trap memory compensates for my  information overload induced paralysis, or Hannah quietly tidy-ing up the house when no one is looking, or James and Julia quizzing Hannah on her math facts for homework while I’m preoccupied with ugly traffic.  Nick hopping on an earlier flight home from a business trip and making the kids’ Christmas program was a tremendous blessing as are small-world moments with old and new friends, an impromptu conversation that solves a lingering quandary or brings forth fresh ideas, an encouraging word, a burst of energy on a hard run, or a hot cup of tea on a cold morning.  They are everywhere, and I pray that I would have eyes to see and honor them all.

This year has not been without its challenges, but it’s just part of this grand adventure.  I’m finding that remembering and contemplating the blessings helps to assure us that those valleys are temporary opportunities for personal growth and that great new blessings are just around the corner.  When I have the wherewithal to practice this, I’m left in a state of anticipatory wonder.  I remain in awe of our Greatest Blessing of all, however, when Jesus stepped out of eternity and entered this broken world as a fragile newborn to experience the human condition alongside us.  And that He did it because of His unfathomable, never-ending, evil-conquering Love for us. It honestly blows my mind every time I think about it.  As I type this, I pray blessings over you and your family. That your wounds, seen and unseen, would be bound, your paths would be made straight and that you would fully know and feel how very loved you are today and every day after.

With Love,

Nick, Ali, Emmy (10), Hannah (7), Julia (6), James (6) & Molly (12 ;-)

The Horn Family