10 months old, 7 months down and 1 MONTH UNTIL R&R!

Our little ray of sunshine has taken her job seriously over the last few weeks.  Emmy's zest for life is contagious; it's hard not to smile when she's around.  Her favorite game is tug-o-war with her spoon and sippy cup at meals times.  She holds either of these items out to me, with a cautious smile on her face, as she waits for me to "take the bait."  As soon as I do, she dissolves into giggles as we "fight" over her grimy flatware.  Thankfully, Emmy mostly likes to feed herself finger foods (although I think the mess is comparable to that when she uses a spoon).  One of her favorite foods is tofu, much to her Daddy's chagrin.  She began army crawling in the 48 hours I was away from her in Washington and has only become more proficient each day.  She pulls herself up to her knees, usually to reach the clicker, my phone or laptop--her three most coveted "toys."

We are beyond grateful to see the sixth month of this deployment come to a close, although we will always carry with us scars from the psychological battle wounds that came with it.  We had no idea what God had in store for us as we passed the halfway point; but then we never do, we just pray that it's nothing like this.

Since the accident, Nick has been working insanely long hours.  He is commanding the company and also completing the job of one of our fallen, Lieutenant Colonel Baldwin, overseeing one of the important mission sets.  There really is no ending point in sight to this arrangement, as there isn't anyone available who is qualified to take over either position.  He is taking it day by day, and has an incredible way of managing the stress that he's dealing with.  I am in awe of him, really.  Their mission sets are the same, despite the fact that they are now operating with one less aircraft and crew.  The big green machine stops for no one.

After returning home from the funerals last week, the emotion of it all washed over me completely.  I barely shed a tear at any of the funerals; and just as I was questioning my reaction (or lack thereof), it hit me.  All at once.  Sadness for my grieving friends and fear of Nick's own safety swept over me something fierce.  Nick and I have discussed that we don't have the luxury of falling apart, because his soldiers and my families are looking to us to keep them strong.  Any difficult situation that I have faced in my past pales in comparison to this, plain and simple.  But together, with God, we will prevail.

And in a little over one month, we will be together again.  It can't come fast enough.