Update

I just want to let you know that we are doing as well as can be considering the circumstances.  I will give more details, there are just so many, once I have the time to reflect...

Nick and his soldiers held a beautiful Memorial service for all of the fallen last Friday at 1300 Afghanistan time.  Nick had the unimaginably difficult responsibility of speaking about his three soldiers, Matt Wagstaff, Jonah McClellan and Marvin Calhoun.  The wives of his soldiers tell me it was nothing short of moving.  There were a large number of military dignitaries present to celebrate these soldiers including General Petraeus, General Rodriguez, General Campbell and many others who I didn't have a chance to write down.  Nick tells me that he wasn't nervous about his audience, but he was hoping to not lose his composure.  Despite how difficult his job, he made it through without breaking down.  He was very relieved for that.  Once the video from the event arrives back in the states, and the families of the fallen receive their copies, we will have a viewing of it for all the Lancer families.  I know for certain it will help with the grieving process and begin to provide some closure.  Nick tells me that last Friday was the first day his entire company of soldiers were in the same room since last January.  They were all "back in the saddle" completing their various missions the following day.

On the home front, things have been very chaotic providing support to our one local widow, offering opportunities for the wives of the surviving soldiers to grieve and coordinating gatherings, tributes and travel to funerals.  Once the 24 hour waiting period had lapsed after the final notification of kin had occurred my phone has rung consistently with people seeking information and support.

Marin and Lindsey showed up on my doorstep Thursday morning and helped me care for Emmy and comforted me between phone calls.  It was exactly what I needed, I am so grateful for their help.

That evening, our company was briefed on what information could be shared, it became even more apparent to me then what an incredible group of families I am working with.  Their strength is nothing short of inspiring.  Friday morning, one of our spouses welcomed everyone into her home for some playtime for our children and some "group therapy" for the spouses.  Right now, our wives are struggling with a great deal of survivor's guilt and are in great need of talking it out with eachother.

Saturday morning was our Video Teleconference FRG Meeting.  It had been on the calendar weeks ago as a celebration for the halfway mark of the deployment, but it now served as a much more important gathering.  Our soldiers and their wives were able to meet at one (virtual) table to discuss how we intend to move forward.  After the formal meeting concluded, we had"open mic" where families could privately meet and see one another.  Because our internet connection is poor, most of our families have not been able to see one another in months.  Nick and I got very positive feedback, which was an incredible relief to us both.

At my request, Kris drove in to help me on Friday night and Mom arrived on Saturday.  Emmy is as cheerful and active as ever, which under most circumstances I would love, but it has made it very difficult for me to complete all that I need to for our grieving Lancer families.  I feel so blessed to have their help, and the help of everyone who have offered.  Thank you all so much.

I am in the process of tying up some loose ends and packing.  Mom and I leave with Emmy and the dogs tomorrow to travel to Kris and JP's house in Indiana.  From there, I will be leaving Thursday morning for Battle Ground, Washington for CW2 Jonah McClellan's viewing and funeral services.  Friday night, I will be flying back to Indiana for SGT Marvin Calhoun's funeral on Saturday morning (it is taking place in Elkhart, Indiana).  Monday morning I am traveling to Orem, Utah for CW3 Matt Wagstaff's viewing and funeral services.

This tragedy has rocked us all to our core.  Despite the incredible pain that so many people are struggling with, there have been so many examples of God's work in the last week and months prior to this tragedy.  One of our widows has confirmed that to me as well.  I just don't know how we would get through this without our faith and our trust in God.