Its been over a year since I last posted anything on the blog. I have so many drafts filled with pictures, but for some reason adding words to them has been more than I could manage. This last year was such a full one. So many changes and challenges. I wish that I had all the joyful ones documented in depth, but truth-be-told, they were deeply intertwined with lot of really, really hard ones that were not very pretty to look at, and perhaps I didn't want those ones remembered in quite so much depth.
I suppose acknowledging the hard times better illustrates just how momentous the joyful ones were...
Our time at Stanford was Nick's transition year between the army and civilian life, and it was brutal. In all of our (at the time) nine years of marriage and the seven (on and off) years of dating prior to that, we'd lived an incredibly volatile army lifestyle. His job demands always came first, that's just how the army is. No matter how hard I cried or begged him not to go, the big green machine kept moving on, and took him along. Part of being an army wife, and a reason I will always be fiercely protective of them, is that you are left to pick up the pieces in the wake of that big green machine and try to piece together some semblance of normalcy for your family with what you have. I remember one of my desperate, crying phone calls to my sister as I was terrified of Nick's impending command, she reminded me of my calling to protect our family while Nick was protecting our country. The kids and I maintained a routine, day and night, one that had to (and often did) operate without Daddy.
Once Nick completed his time in the army, there were a flood of hardships that none of us anticipated, nor were we really prepared to handle. I won't attempt to speak for Nick, because I can't begin to understand all the emotions he felt parting with a job he loved for the unknown, but they were significant. While he wrestled (and continues to wrestle) with those feelings, the rest of us were trying to figure out a new routine, in a new place, with new people (most of which had no understanding of where we came from) and incorporate Daddy into the mix (as much as grad school would allow.) It was painful, but necessary. And it's far from over.
The MSx program at Stanford was such a blessing and an incredible jumping off point for Nick, providing him with many opportunities he wouldn't have otherwise had. He was very anxious about finding a job after graduation because of the specificity of his work in the Army. Beginning in the fall of 2015, Nick chose to participate in a program that pushed his resume out to many different companies (Google and Amazon, among the very widely known and several lesser known to the general population but well-respected companies like ICON Aircraft and Alpine Investors.) He had 20+ interviews and follow-up interviews over the course of a few months and ended up with job offers from Amazon (based in Seattle,) ICON Aircraft (based in Fairfield, CA) and Alpine Investors (could be anywhere in the country) by Christmas 2015. Even though he was in a prime position just halfway through the MSx program, anxiety set in which direction he was meant to go in.
Amazon is notorious for working their employees into the ground in their constant quest for evolution and improvement of their business. Nick has been told that with a couple of years experience at Amazon, he would be set for any job he wanted after that. Which appealed to him from a work experience stand-point, but our family was ready for him to be a stable fixture. We prayed hard between ICON Aircraft at Alpine Investors. I was inclined to go with ICON (a private luxury jet company) mostly because I thought he might be able to keep flying, which is something he desperately misses, but also because I new it would anchor us here in California. Nick was leaning towards Alpine because of the experience he could get in private equity. Ultimately, we chose Alpine Investors in the end of January 2016.
Alpine is a private equity firm that buys mid-sized software companies, inserts their own leadership, revamps the companies and then sells them. Nick was accepted into their CEO-In-Training (CIT) program, where they are grooming him to take over one of their companies in the future. To do this, the CITs are paired with a seasoned CEO to work with and learn from. Nick underwent the "dating" process to determine with whom he would be paired. The process began quite some time later than we anticipated, and was completed in the middle of May, as we were anxiously anticipating graduation and our impending move-out date. Nick was torn between working with a CEO at an established company in Tampa, Florida or working with a CEO whose company was yet-to-be-determined, meaning we had no idea where our family would need to move. Along with his superiors at Alpine, we decided that Nick would work with the CEO whose company was undecided and that we would find a rental home in the bay area. He would commute to the home office in San Francisco until his permanent workplace was determined, because it could take several months. That way, even if Nick had to travel a lot, the kids and I would have a home base near to our families for the school year, and then if we needed to uproot the following summer we would. It was not what I had pictured, but I found solace that this was God's plan. We would cherish this time near family, while Nick's work progressed.
Finding a rental home in the bay area was something I had worried so much about, even before we made the decision to come to Stanford. In Silicon Valley, where we were living during school, teeny-tiny rentals begin at several thousands of dollars a month. And people pay it in a heartbeat, because it's the epicenter of tech and commute is a quality of life issue around here. There is so much money in tech, and so many dual-income families, that people can and will pay top-dollar to live nearer to their work. It makes me sick to my stomach how much people will pay for even the smallest, most unkempt homes. It's so out-of-control that it's a focus of local legislature.
Knowing that Nick would be commuting to the city, and that sitting in traffic for a couple of hours each way everyday will kill your soul, we centered our search in Castro Valley, where there is a BART station and a 35 minute ride to the Embarcadero Station (a 5 minute walk from Nick's office.) Our other top priority was schools for the kids, and my mom teaches at an elementary school in Castro Valley that's known for it's excellence. Not to mention, Kris and JP live there and have started putting roots down in the community through school and sports with the kids.
In March, Kris had a conversation with an acquaintance through school, who was planning to rent her family's home when they moved to southern California in the beginning of the summer. She was eager to find someone who would take care of her home as their own, because she was so sad to be leaving it, her dream home. Nick and I saw the house a week or so after the initial conversation and it was more than we ever could have imagined having in California (and especially after spending the year in our little apartment!) They were eager to have us in their home and were flexible on the rent. The only trouble was we didn't know, at that point, with which CEO Nick would be working and therefore where we'd be living, so we couldn't commit. They said no problem, they would wait for us to know. They waited two months until they really couldn't wait any longer with their own impending move. Nick called me in the middle of May, after a meeting at Alpine to tell me that the decision had been made, we would be staying in California, and that we'd take their house. I called the woman immediately only to find out they had signed a lease with someone else that morning. They had been inundated by aggressive potential renters, some ready to sign a lease sight-unseen, as soon as they posted the listing on Craigslist and the process happened more quickly than they had planned.
Simultaneously defeated and terrified of entering into the dog-eat-dog rental rat race, I fired up Craig's list to scroll through listing after listing. There weren't many listings in the area we were focused on, so I applied to all of them. The first open house we attended was quite literally an open house. There were loads of people that arrived at the minute the door was opened and many barely looked at the home (with a $3500 a month price tag!) to get into line to hand their applications to the property manager. Nick and I were so overwhelmed and dismayed.
A few days later, I had a private showing of another home in the Palomares Hills subdivision. It was for rent-by-owner. Nick had class, so I drove out to the east bay, dropped the kiddos off with Kris and showed up, right on time with my application, a "thank you for your consideration note" and a family picture (as I had read was the best thing to do to set your application apart.) The home was 4 bedrooms, 3 bathrooms with a yard, a community park, pool and fed into my mom's school. The rent was less than the original home we'd looked at in March. The only thing I didn't care for was the 17 year old, worn, burbur carpeting. Which really was a positive because I didn't worry about the kids playing on them. It was ideal. I was so nervous. The initial conversation with the owner/Landlord was pretty awkward, but I was pleasantly surprised that the current tenant, a coast guard officer, was there, and we had an easy conversation about military life. In the end, it as a great meeting, so I left and prayed.
As it turns out, later that night, Kris and JP drove past the home and realized it was right across the street from Claire's best friend, Kate's, family. Kris immediately got in touch with Kate's mom, Angie, who got in touch with another neighbor and her best friend, Chris. Chris immediately sent Jackie (the owner/landlord) an e-mail to vouch for our family. A few hours later, Jackie contacted me and said she would be happy to have us rent her home. I cried tears of pure joy.
We continued with the back-ground check and I had a really unsettled feeling about Molly. The listing had said no pets, but we applied anyway because there were no listings that would accept pets. I prayed about it, and decided to let Jackie know about Molly, because I couldn't stand the idea of smuggling her it. It had been so uncomfortable having Molly in our apartment after Darla died and my parents' moved, when she was most definitely not supposed to be there. (As an aside, I used to take Molly with us every where we went because I was so worried about her barking and blowing her cover, but the kids would leave the back gate open and Molly would run out onto the communal playground on a regular basis, so her cover was totally blown. I once had the daughter of one of the RAs ask me how we could have Molly in Escondido when dogs aren't allowed. I got so upset, so Nick ordered a $30 therapy dog card online. I was counting down the minutes until we could be open dog owners again.)
I wrote Jackie an e-mail about Molly, prayed and hit send. I was terrified that we would lose this unbelievable home, but I couldn't live with myself for being dishonest (again.) She wrote back almost immediately and said she would talk to her husband and think about it, but she was terribly allergic to pets. I wrote back to tell her that I am also allergic to cats and dogs, but that Molly is a toy poodle and hypoallergenic. I then decided I needed to do some research just in case she asked me more questions. Of course, the only articles that came up when I googled "hypoallergenic dogs" was that it's not totally accurate. I could barely sleep that night, worried about what they'd say and that we'd lose the house. Low and behold, first thing in the morning, I had an e-mail from Jackie that said they'd accept Molly with a $50 a month increase in rent. DONE! I cried UGLY tears. Everything was falling into place.
We were supposed to move out of our apartment two days after graduation (whoever made that rule has obviously never had to do it!) Nick was adamant that they wouldn't throw us out and we would pay the fine until we got the keys to our new rental home three days later. Everyday the cleaning crew came to get started and Nick would meet them at the door to inform them that we weren't gone yet. On June 15th, we dropped the kids with Nick's parents, picked up the house key in Castro Valley, rented a U-haul and worked feverishly for 24 hours to clear everything out of our apartment and our storage unit, in order to turn the apartment key in and avoid paying the fine for another day late. I'll never forget the final night in the apartment, it was torn up to high Heaven's. Around one in the morning, Nick forced me to stop working because we needed a few hours of sleep before we had to finish and turn the key in by 8 am. It seemed like an impossible feat that we'd be out of there in time, but both of us couldn't see straight we were so tired. Molly and I climbed into one of the girls' school-provided twin beds, Nick in the other and got a precious few hours of sleep. It remember thinking that it should be a sentimental moment, but after the difficulty of the year, my eyes were firmly fixed forward.
The next day was mayhem. We successfully met our 8 am deadline (I was still throwing things outside the door and vacuuming while Nick rode his bike to the key-drop off box.) It wasn't pretty, but we did it. We realized that it feels so good to get all the big items moved out, but the lions share of the work is all the little things that have accumulated.
I was overjoyed to be reunited with all of our things that had spent the year in the storage unit. I get weepy thinking about looking around at our familiar things in an unfamiliar space. It brought so much peace. Our families and friends showed up in a big way to get all of our things moved in and our storage unit closed out. The kids were tickled to come home to their new rooms, many toys that had spent the year in storage and THREE POTTIES!!
We were barely moved in when we started getting acquainted with our new neighbors. We realized that directly across the street from us are three families that had lived side-by-side for many years. They had enjoyed Friday night beer and pizza in the front yard for just as long and everything in between. They couldn't have been more welcoming of us into their circle. After so many years of friendship and, well, just their edgy personalities, they have no filter. Nick, particularly, had found his people! The first time they met, he walked across the street to say hello with a Coors light in hand. They made him pour it out and got him a "real" beer instead. To say Nick was amused was putting it lightly. The kids made fast friends with their slightly older kids, and we found ourselves plugged in to Denison Place.
The big girls started Vacation Bible School the week after we moved in, and I was overjoyed to see that it was just as big a deal in Castro Valley as it was in Clarksville, Tennessee. I truly miss the Christian community in Tennessee, and found myself as very much a minority (aside from the wonderful Mormons!) at Stanford. I was so happy to know the kids had a place to go that reinforced our values.
After a quick trip down south to visit Auntie Kerry, Legoland and Disneyland, we were back in time for Nick to begin work on July 5th. It was such a whirlwind.
Nick began work and, to borrow his analogy, it was like drinking water from a firehose. Nine months in, it's only picked up. He is working with a seasoned CEO on a start-up "aggregator." They are working to purchase several smaller software companies to revamp and, several years down the road, sell. Typically, someone in Nick's position would partner with a seasoned CEO and join them in the company they are already working to revamp or assist them as they find and purchase their one company. Nick's current position is highly atypical, and he's working with a spectacular leader who is the opposite of a "micromanager." So, Nick is working hard to earn his keep. Early mornings, late nights and lots of travel have been the norm since the beginning. We are so proud of him and grateful for how hard he works to provide for our family.
After a great summer getting acquainted with our neighborhood, spending time with our families, Art camp for Emmy, Dancing Princess camp for Hannah, swimming lessons, potty training, etc. We started back at school. Emmy's first day was August 22nd (Mom's birthday!) Hannah, James and Julia started the third week in September.
Sometime in August, Kris and JP had gotten word that the rent on their home was going to be significantly increasing. We were all dismayed by the reminder that, as renters, we really are at the Landlord's mercy. The very end of August, there was a "for sale" sign at the end of our street, which, we had now grown to love. I remember telling Nick about it over the phone the day that I noticed it. He told me "wouldn't it be crazy if we bought the house and Kris and JP could move into our rental? We laughed about it and went on to talk about other things. Nick came home from work that day and saw the sign, too, and suggested that we look at it for fun. He called the listing agent the next day, and told me that it wasn't yet on the market but that they were happy to show it. He scheduled a time for me to go see it later that day since he was away on business. The three littles and I walked down the street, six doors down, for our appointment time. I had no emotional connection to the house, I was just curious what it looked like, but as soon as I walked inside, I fell in love.
It is situated at the very end of the cul-de-sac, but because the cul-de-sac is a look out point, there is only one neighboring house. The view from the front of the house int he San Francisco bay. The view from the side/back yard is of rolling green hills. Just minutes after I walked inside, I learned the house has 5 bedrooms and 4 bathrooms. 5 bedrooms is highly unusual in these types of homes. And 4 bathrooms?!? Knowing that this house could have enough space for our family to grow-and potentially each of our children to have their own bedroom was amazing. The seller was an elderly woman who lived here with her adult son, so the house was in spectacular shape. Everything was original from when it was built in 2000, but maintained beautifully. White walls (which I learned is common with asian people, who knew?!) everywhere, cozy white carpets throughout except for tile in the entryway and light linoleum in the bathrooms making it the PERFECT blank slate. The backyard isn't huge (the front yard is quite large) an was very simply landscaped with a large patio and four lemon trees and mulch on a small embankment. My idea of a low-maintenance yard. But the view, oh my word, the view! Breath-taking! All but one window (in the twins' room) has a beautiful view.
The kids acted like total maniacs during the showing sliding up and down the stairs, running around claiming "their" rooms. The realtor, a sweet grandmother, couldn't have been more patient with us as we took a video tour for Daddy. The agent said the house hadn't hit the market yet, but would by the end of the week. I loved the house, but surprised myself by how I didn't let my emotions take over. This all had happened so quickly. We had just moved into our rental home three months before, what might the penalty be for breaking the lease? Are we even going to be here long term? Nick just started work at this job. Can we afford their asking price? We found a rental home that we are SO BLESSED to live in. As much as I loved the house I was emotionally detached from buying it, I was determined to answer every one of my thousand questions and consult with every discerning person we know whether or not it was a wise decision to buy this home.
I called Nick immediately upon leaving and told him everything and promptly sent him our video tour. He was out-of-town for several days and wasn't able to see the house himself. I got to work mapping out our budget. Drawing on hours of listening to Dave Ramsey's radio show, every dollar had a name. When we moved back to California, Grammy and Poppy had so very generously offered us a gift as an "upfront inheritance" to use for a down payment on a house, saying that it was best to have it when we really needed it. With that, and investments that Nick had made from his unspent college money, we had a sizable down payment. I calculated the same number a hundred times and we could afford the home. As it turns out, the interest rates in California were at a historic low and we were able to secure a rate of 3.25% for a 30-year fixed loan. How long would this last? There was no way of knowing. Investing the money into a home and enjoying the tax benefits of home ownership, rather than sinking almost $50,000 a year into rent seemed like the wise thing to do from a financial standpoint.
My next question was whether or not we'd be here long term. We'd moved to Castro Valley as a holding place while Nick's workplace was confirmed. Nick shared with me that he would be working from the home office in the Embarcadero in San Francisco permanently. Because of the nature of their company, they would have a portfolio of businesses all over the country, so we would we headquartered here. WOW.
I asked him about location...Do we want to stay in Castro Valley or do we want to move further into the east bay closer to where we grew up? Nick was vehemently opposed to moving further east because the commute to the city is so miserable. Moving any further down the freeway would lead to a much more extended commute, which he already struggles with. The Castro Valley BART station is an easy 10 minutes from our house and it's a 35 minute BART ride to the Embarcadero station that is 5 minutes to Nick's office. An hour commute (while unpleasant being stuffed into BART like sardines most of the time) is impressive given the horrible traffic that so many people commute in every day.
Castro Valley is a little gem of a town. I've learned that many people who grew up here, come back. People who live here are so normal, like us. Hard working people who care about their families. Crime is usually low (though I'm learning that living in a place so densely populated as the bay area, it happens quite a bit more than living out in the country.) The elementary schools, most especially Jensen Ranch, where Emmy, Andy and Clairey go to school is top-notch. Mom used to describe it as being like a little private school, and I absolutely see that. The middle schools are good, and the high school is ok. I began talking to our neighbors, particularly the ones who had older children, to learn about their school experience, since that is was matters most to me. From all accounts, the elementary school is spectacular. Our community has many asian families, and I have learned that, culturally, education is paramount. That's worth noting. The middle school experience is just fine. Many of the families that I spoke to sent their kids to private Christian/Catholic school for high school, though the families that sent their children to Castro Valley High said that they had a fine experience there, that what mattered most was their child's social group, which honestly matters anywhere. There was a lot of information to chew on, but, being that Emmy was just beginning first grade and the three littles hadn't even started yet, we have many years until high school is even a consideration and we don't even know what our lives will be like at that point. We can only make decisions with the information we have now about the kid's school.
I did searches for comparable homes to see if this was a wise investment for the area. Truthfully, I had a hard time finding any because the size of the home and the location. I looked into comparable outside of Castro Valley, particularly in Lafayette and Orinda, which would make for a comparable commute for Nick to the city and the home prices were astronomical for half the space.
It became clear that Castro Valley was really the best place for our family to settle. Considering that we had hit the jackpot with neighbors that we'd already gotten to know, the location of where the house is situated (on the cul-de-sac), a mostly level lot on a level street (many, many homes in our subdivision are situated on very steep inclines.) Homes on our street rarely go for sale, there are a handful of renters who live in homes with the Landlord being the original owner. If we wait until our lease is up in June to start looking for a home, we will enter the real estate market at the middle of high-season. We have heard of countless home-buying nightmares with outrageous bidding wars, and with this home we have inside knowledge about the home simply because we live on the street, no one else knows it's for sale. If we can put a good offer on the home before it goes to market, perhaps the seller will appreciate avoiding the stress and expense that will come with that. But then again, maybe they want an ugly bidding war to see how much they can get for the house.
We talked with our neighbors to see what they knew about the seller, she is a widowed, elderly asian woman who lived here since the house was built with her adult son. She owns Korean restaurant in Dublin and mostly kept to herself. They did say she had tried to sell the house before, when the market was tanking in 2008, for an unreasonably high price (like, hundreds of thousands of dollars above comparable) and would not budge. Obviously, eventually taking it off the market.
My last concern was breaking our lease. I combed through our rental agreement and there was no clause about breaking the lease. I researched every rental law I could get my hands on and there was no standard procedure, it's simply between the Landlord and Renter how that is handled. Nick and I felt awful about the prospect of breaking the lease, but knew that that could not be the only reason we didn't put an offer on the house. We didn't even know if if would be accepted. If it was, I was determined to do everything in my power to help find new renters.
All of our homework was done over the three days between my showing and when the house was expected to "go live." Every bit of our findings and every conversation that we had with those we trusted most told us to go for it. We didn't want to risk it going to market and the bidding war that could ensue, we wanted no part of that. We decided to place an offer of the asking price and that was our very best offer. We firmly told the agent that we would not budge on that amount, and were emotionally detached enough to walk away. We had a wonderful rental home to live in, if this didn't work out, it was clearly not part of God's plan for our family. It was a win-win situation either way.
Sight unseen, Nick contacted our agent to proceed forward with the offer. Sweating profusely and states apart, we each docu-signed the offer and submitted it the morning the house was meant to hit the market. By the grace of God, our offer was accepted by dinner time.
We got the phone call while we were outside having pizza and beer with our neighbors. We congratulated each other with deer-in-headlights looks in our eyes. What a a difference a week makes in the course of your life.
The next few weeks were very, very stressful and busy ones. We had to complete the loan application and provide every bit of information about ourselves short of blood samples. Things were heating up with Nick at work and he was under a phenomenal amount of stress there trying to keep up, but unfortunately needed to provide the lions share of the documents given that he his our sole provider. It was a tough time on us and there were times we questioned if we did the right thing. We kept saying, if this isn't meant to be, it won't be. But the sale progressed to the point where we knew the home was going to be ours, and it was time for me to contact our Landlord.
I was literally sick to my stomach as I wrote her the e-mail. Breaking the lease was our only reservation with putting the offer on the house, though it wasn't a reason not to. I thanked her profusely for letting our family live in her home, told her we loved it so much we wanted to settle here, explained the situation and told her that I wold do everything in my power to find new renters who would love the house as much as we did. I prayed, and hit send. I got a text message from her the next morning while I was on the playground at the three littles preschool orientation day. She congratulated us and told me to check my e-mail. I was hyperventialting when I read my e-mail where she outlined what comes next. We would not be penalized, just on the hook for paying rent until we found a new renter, which is exactly what we were hoping for. She said it might be tricky to find a renter because the school year had already started (albeit 2 weeks prior) but she was happy to release us from our lease once we secured someone else. She would replace the ad on Craigslist the next day.
I got to work immediately cleaning up the house for showings. I anticipated a rush of applicants as we had seen in our experience renting. But, that wasn't the case. A week went by and there was nothing. I could not figure out what was happening. I offered to take new photos of the house because the ones she had weren't very good. One thing I had learned from selling our previous two houses is just how important quality photos of a well-staged house can be in selling a home. As soon as I got the green light, I got to work and sent her the new files by the end of the day. I contacted our real estate agent who also does property management for any bit of advice that she could give. She, too, was perplexed why we hadn't gotten any bites. She recommended putting a listing on zillow.com and holding an open house, with permission from Jackie, I put an ad up and scheduled an open house for the upcoming weekend. No one came to the open house! In the next couple of days we had a couple of showings, which was so encouraging. Both people said they would submit applications but either did and didn't qualify or didn't follow through. I was getting so discouraged and terribly worried about paying a mortgage and rent.
I combed through the other homes also for rent, and they were going quickly. It didn't seem that the school year already underway was an issue for other people. The house was well-priced based on the comparables. I was completely bewildered. I combed through the ad one afternoon and noticed at the bottom, they were asking for a security deposit of $5,000 as well as first and last months rent...Totaling just under $12,000 in order for someone to move in (that's not including MOVING expenses!) That was significantly more than what we paid, though in hindsight, I recall needing to write a check when I got the key for the partial first months rent, and being surprised because I thought I had already paid it, low and behold I had already paid the security deposit and LAST month's rent. We had a moving truck outside the house at the time, so I didn't make a deal about it and wrote the check, but it all made a lot more sense now. Typically, landlords ask for a security deposit (usually equalling a month's rent) and first month's rent. I started doing some research into this and found that, legally, a landlord can ask for a security deposit, first and last month's rent, but the total cannot exceed three month's worth of rent. Most landlords don't because they recognize that the total would make it prohibitively expensive for quality renters. The amount of money our landlords were requiring prior to move in was significantly in excess of what they could legally ask for. No wonder we weren't getting many bites.
I called Nick, who was already in over his head at work, but his pitbull tendencies kicked into high gear. I had built up a good rapport with Jackie, so Nick and I agreed that he would be the heavy if things got tricky. We needed to navigate this delicately because they were letting us out of the lease agreement without penalty and at the end of the day, they would still be getting rent from us whether or not we were living in their house. They didn't feel the same urgency as we did. Nick explained to Jackie that the security deposit was excessive, which was perhaps why we weren't getting any bites, she reluctantly brought it down to what was legal. It was still far more than what other, comparable homes were requiring. In all, we had 10 showings, 9 promises of application submissions, 4 actual application submissions, 2 open houses (with 0 attendees,) 2 accepted applications, 1 lease offer turned down, and one, blessedly accepted by the woman I showed the home to after our appointment to sign closing papers. Once I got confirmation of her security deposit being paid and lease papers being signed and an intended move-in date four days after our move-out date, I dissolved into the ugliest of happy tears. God's plan usually leaves me on the edge of my seat, but He ALWAYS provides.
For some reason, it takes a couple of days for the closing paperwork to hit the recorder's office, so we didn't get the keys to the house for another couple of days after closing. Which turned out to be a blessing. Nick was scheduled for a couple of work trips and, before having the confirmed dates of closing we were trying to figure out our move between trips. I was having flashbacks from our previous moves, trying to manage it on my own and was really fearful of juggling it all. After learning when we'd get our keys and when the new tenants were able to move, we were so grateful to learn that we had a weekend free of work obligations so that we could avoid killing ourselves completing the move in an unreasonable timeline.
I was beyond tired from all the rental house showing and from moving in general. I'd just finished unpacking boxes as I was cleaning the house for showings. I waffled on painting the kids' rooms as they'd been with the decor we'd had in our beloved homes in Tennessee, and after much contemplation decided that now was the only time to do it. I had to wait until Nick got back from his business trips so that he'd be at home in the evenings so that I could paint. Unfortunately, I just had two available nights between his return and our move-in day. The first night, I jetted out to Lowes as soon as the kids went to bed to gather paint and all my supplies and the second night, my precious sister joined me and helped me paint Emmy, Hannah and James and Julia's rooms. We were beyond exhausted, but turned up some of my best inspirational Christian songs, tore into a bag of popcorn, pulled on our paper painter's caps and tackled the project. Kris painted Hannah's room the most beautiful gray (of course I'd lost the paint chips from the old house and had to start over at Lowe's the night before, so I threw up a Hail Mary in hopes I got it right!) And I got to work on the pale mint color in Emmy's room. We finished the big girls' rooms about 12:30 and Kris made me promise that I wouldn't touch the twins' room. She almost had me convinced that it was a bad idea, until she left, and I knew there was no way I'd be able to get it painted before their things were moved in the next afternoon. So, I cracked open the can of paint at 12:35 and put my paint brush down at 3:00. That was probably my most productive night to date, I'm so grateful it's done.
I drove the 15 second drive home, retired my trusty painting clothes, showered and climbed in to bed for a blessed few hours of sleep. I woke up in a panic because the house was ANYTHING but ready to move. Nothing had been packed and it was a disaster area. My orgnizational motto is "like things with like things" but there were clothes, toys, random stuff littering the floors. As soon as I got Hannah to school that morning at 9, the twins and I ran to the store to get cabinet lining and then raced home so that I could spend an hours throwing things in the right rooms. I remember being so flustered, pushing the twins in the double stroller around Orchard Supply Hardware looking for cabinet lining, with their limbs outstretched or dragging their feet on the ground to serve as brakes. It was all I could do not to burst into tears. The day when I didn't have a minute to spare. God was reminding me to slow down.
We got home, and I tore through the house throwing things in the right room and then in boxes right up until the moment I had to pack a picnic lunch, leave to get Hannah from school so that we could make it out to Emmy's school's Walk-A-Thon. We walked our hearts out for a few hours to raise money for the school and then raced home to collect the kid's overnight bags to head over to Grammy and Poppy's. In the 4 hours between leaving to get Hannah from preschool and finishing the Walk-A-Thon, Nick, my Dad, my brother, and later on were joined by our incredible neighbors across the street, had emptied the house of most of our furniture on the rented trailer hitched to my dad's truck one trip at a time. It was unbelievable. I was speechless.
I loaded up the kids and made the drive, in rush hour traffic out to Alamo. Grammy and Poppy so kindly welcomed the kids over for a sleepover while we were moving (again!) It was such an incredible blessing. I returned home to an even emptier house and a larger crowd of helpers. I had to fight tears walking into the house.
We've had so many (hard) moves since we got married (at the time almost 10 years before)--seven to be exact. My move from California to Alabama after we got married in February of 2007 (I lost my brand new-just-paid-off car in transit when the transport truck had a blow-out and caught fire on top of so many things mishandled when they were dumped in storage for weeks without my knowledge,) We moved from Alabama to 4064 Challis in Clarksville in May of 2007 and got to clean out the house after the tenant moved out and then tackle the daunting task of merging my minimalist style with Nick's affinity for collecting things. In June of 2012, we moved with the incredible help of our church family from 4064 Challis to 1211 Drakes Cove Road North after confirmation that we'd be staying in Tennessee for at least a few more years. Juggling the buying and selling process with a strong-willed two year old and a four month old and a deployment in the middle of it was difficult to say the least. Moving out of 1121 Drakes Cove in June 2015 and dividing our things into storage and Nick's parents' garage until we got a housing assignment was one of the biggest challenges of my life. Packing ourselves with four little "helpers" and then getting all of our things and those little helpers across the country to live like vagabonds for a few weeks was one of the craziest things I've done. Moving into our itty-bitty apartment at Stanford in July 2015 once we got the key just two days before Nick's classes started was one of the biggest character-building opportunities I've faced, but not nearly as much as living there for a full year. Moving out of Stanford and into 7521 Denison Place in June of 2016 was logistically complicated, but with the help of our amazing family and friends, the greatest reward. Moving has always been so bittersweet for us...
....Which is why the ease of this move, just six doors down, with ample hands packing, lifting, carrying our things and loving hands meeting our babies' needs, I was overcome with gratitude. Six months later, I still am.
That night, October 15, 2016, Nick and I went to sleep, in our bed that had been assembled and made up with sheets and blankets, by our neighbors, for our first night in our brand-new home.
The next morning I woke up early to run over to the old house and begin emptying cabinets and closets into boxes, laundry baskets and plastic tubs. It's amazing the noticeable difference in a space when the furniture is moved out, but we have learned that it's the smaller items that truly take the most work to move. I was able to get loads of work done for the couple of hours before Kris and JP and the kids arrived ready to load their minivan and start hauling it down the street. Not long after, Mom and Dad arrived. Dad resumed re-assembling furniture and mom got to work lining all of the cabinets in the new house and organizing the kitchen. Bless her! That is my very least favorite task and she is so very good at it. The neighbors joined in a bit later until the old house was empty. They even brought over 3 dozen tacos from Taco Bell, knowing that it is Nick's very favorite thing in the world. To top it off, they reassembled the twins' cribs which happens to be Nick's very least favorite thing in the world. Blessings on top of blessings.
Nick's parents so very kindly offered to keep the kids and extra night which was an enormous help given we weren't up and running yet in the new house and I still had EVERYTHING to do to restore the rental house to the condition it was in when we moved in just four months before. Our family had done a number on the carpet and walls.
On Sunday morning (after we started moving in on Friday,) I woke up really early, gathered up my cleaning supplies and step ladder and got started on what turned out to be a 14 hour cleaning day scrubbing literally every inch of the inside of that house. I touched up the paint the next morning (Monday) while the twins were playing in the entryway (and not touching ANYTHING) before the carpet cleaner came. Wednesday was my walk-through with our Landlord and I was so prayerful that we would earn back every penny of our security deposit. That was my carrot to keep cleaning. She cut me a check for it all as soon as I handed her the keys. We hugged goodbye, I thanked her for entrusting us with her home and I ran home with the kids, screaming "FREEEEEEEDDDOOOOOMMMM!!!!" In my head, of course.
As we had entered into the home-buying experience, Kris and JP started looking more closely at their options, too. They had just found out their rent would be increasing, which was something they were not anticipating because the Landlord, a friend of my mom's, had said that wouldn't happen. Turns out you can't plan for a terminal cancer diagnosis, and they were trying to "pad the coffers" before her husband's inevitable death. Kris and JP knew that they would be hard-pressed to find something for the same or less than they had been paying, and they were, truthfully, very weary of being at the mercy of the volatile rental market and a (sometimes greedy) Landlord. With the interest rates being as low as they were, Kris and JP decided to look into buying a home as well. And they did. They closed on a home 10 minutes from ours just two weeks after we did. It's just so incredible how it all unfolded.
The second week in November, Nick got to repay the favor moving the Sacksteders into their new home and I got to pitch into the cause loving on Caroline (18 months at the time) so that she didn't halt operations. By the end of November we were all officially spent! And oh-so grateful that Mom and Dad were hosting Thanksgiving! We all had so much to be thankful for, including three new homes for Mom and Dad, The Sacksteder and our family. 2016 brought so much change and so many answered prayers.
I had always dreamed about hosting a big family Christmas--especially after celebrating it so many years away. Some of my very best memories from childhood were the beautiful dinner parties my Grandma Hagg would throw on Christmas Eve and the lively celebrations at Grandma Odell's house on Christmas Day. I was eager to have the chance to re-create that with my own family. I happily volunteered to host Christmas Eve for both of our families and used it as my deadline for getting boxes unpacked and pictures put up on the walls. It was ambitious but man was it worth it. To be surrounded by our parents, my grandpa, my aunts and sister, brothers, sister-in-law, nieces and nephews, and family friends in our very own California home, sitting at our dinner tables, eating on our dishes, surrounded by our Christmas decorations that I've collected that have adorned our Tennessee homes (that none of them had seen before,) preparing food made from recipes I've collected from precious family and friends along the journey...It was a beautiful melding of old and new traditions. My heart couldn't have been more full.
