I want to thank everyone for reaching out and offering Nick, Emmy and I so many supportive and encouraging messages this past week. I haven't yet been able to respond to everyone, but please know that your thoughts and prayers are so very appreciated. It was hard to know just how it would feel sending Nick off this time. This deployment is unlike any that we've done before...While I always worry about his safety and miss him immeasurably, our lives have never been so intricately interwoven as they are now. Our first year-long separation was heart-wrenching, but in hindsight, we were just in a "further away long distance" engagement. The five short deployments with the Regiment were tiring because it was difficult for us to establish a routine with the volatility of the schedule, but the countdown always flew by. This time the goodbye was very different, for both of us...Thankfully we've got experience under our belt to help carry us through these uncharted waters.
The last week before Nick deployed was chaotic, to put it mildly. He made sure his soldiers spent as little time at work as possible to soak up the last chance at family time. Unfortunately, his duty still called...We got news partway through the week that not only was our company was being "attached" to a different Battalion but that we are nearly doubling the number of troops (and therefore families). The timing couldn't have been more unfavorable, mostly because the Battalion that Nick is now attached to had already deployed a few days before. So meeting the acquaintance of Nick's new boss and therefore establishing communication was an impossibility. Already being removed from our old Battalion but not yet being introduced to our new Battalion (and lacking an accurate roster of all the new troops and their family members) on the eve of this deployment posed a difficult and frustrating dilemma. We pretty much felt like lone wolves as we attempted to lead and provide accurate information to our soldiers and their family members. Not really how we had envisioned spending our last days together...But I am learning that that is to be expected when you are married to the commander. I loved that we could muster through the mess together, finding comfort in the ability to lean on one another.
I had wondered how to properly spend our final day together before this big adventure...The agenda kind of just created itself. We spent the day dropping off Nick's bags, running errands, visiting our friends in the hospital who had just had a baby...Emmy had many a feeding in the car, but we were all ok with that because as mundane as the schedule was, we were doing it as a family, which was the whole idea anyways. In the spirit of spontaneity, we decided to go grab a late dinner at the Cheesecake Factory on Monday night because Nick had a hankering for white chocolate raspberry cheesecake. We got Emmy ready for bed, buckled her into her carseat, and made the hour long drive to Nashville. We had a wonderful dinner and didn't skimp on anything (although, let's be real, it's really not possible to "under-do it" at the Cheesecake Factory). We laughed, talked about funny memories and made up an impressive (if I do say so myself) list of our personal and family goals for this next year. I would say it was the best way possible that we could bring our last full day as a family to a close. I cherish the memory.
The morning of the deployment came all too soon (I had kind of hoped that March 16, 2010 would magically fall off the calendar). We made sure to kick the day off with some family cuddle time in our bed. It gets a little crowded with the two of us, Molly, Darla and of course our sweet angel girl, but we love it just the same. Emmy was cracking us up with her smiles. Unlike her father, she LOVES mornings! We had a swedish pancake breakfast, Nick's favorite, and then spent the remainder of time locating last minute items and packing up his carry-on. Nick made a last minute trip to the store to surprise me with my special count-down candy jar! (At the end of each day, I put a bit fat "X" on the calendar and enjoy a mini York Peppermint Patty--one of my faves because they aren't as bad for you as Junior Mints-so I've told myself).
I was keeping it together until, in the car on the way there, he told me that he'd picked up his underwear off the bathroom floor. I had just told him how grateful I would be to arrive home to his mess. Weird, I know, but it's the little things that you find yourself clinging to in times of helplessness like these. Jersey Mike's sub sandwiches in hand (a pre-deployment tradition we've come to count on), we got to the drop-off hangar at 4:00pm up and down. After Nick checked in, he escorted us to the car for the dreaded moment (we wanted our goodbye to be private as opposed to doing it with the masses after a brief ceremony). It broke my heart to see him give Emmy his last kiss goodbye (and I know that it broke his as well :-()...
But, I found comfort in the fact that this wasn't the first drive home that I've made after seeing my love go off to war. I know that we'll be ok, and I know that he'll be ok...He promised me that. We're just taking it one day at a time...
Been there done that...
Deployment September '05- September '06 parking lot goodbye
Deployment March '10-March '11 parking lot goodbye
